Parenting Fail


It would appear that there are boundaries and rules where parenting is concerned; I learnt this after being called a ‘dick’ by my wife, for what on reflection was probably a fair shout.

The naughty step, 3 years 10 months and 2 days – this is the time it has taken my son and I to be introduced to the naughty step. My son is fully aware of its existence, but personally since he once asked my wife does the naughty step have WIFI the punishment slightly lost its edge.

You may have read previously that my son has a fantastic aim where a punch to the balls is required, ( Expect the Unexpected ) yesterday evening however this led to a quick military march to the naughty step, I say a march I was actually struggling to breath let alone walk.

Upon arrival to the stairs with said Son in floods of tears, I froze, which of the steps is the naughty step, there were no clear signs or clues, does it matter but of course it matters we have to maintain a standard. The wife was busy with the twins and besides this was my battle, so in a stern voice I asked said 3 year old which was the naughty step, it was difficult to understand through the floods of tears but he settled on step number 1.

Personally I would have chosen step 4 it has a larger foot print and certainly offers a better view, great minds think alike and said 3 year old then began to climb the stairs – as an experienced 3 year old he obviously decided that step 4 wasn’t for him and continued till he was at the top looking down on me, with a fucking smile………..

Rage sets in – I skip like a trained athlete taking 2 and on occasion 3 stairs in one stride, seeking sympathy from his mum I took control and frog marched child back to bottom of the stairs, this time making a parental decision that its stair number 3.

Guilt now sets in – I never wanted to make him cry.

Shit – how long does one stay on the naughty step, 2nd parent fail is through negotiating a time – we settle on a single minute, at this point I can hear my wife sigh.

Furthermore whilst on the naughty step apparently you are not supposed to engage in conversation, well there was fuck up number 3.

This brings me to communication – if you set the rules it’s only fair that these are shared, hence I never saw the memo titled naughty Step, so yes a Dick once more.